Item #: FOC-058

Object Class: Arcane

Name: Lord Spoingus

Containment Protocols: FOC-058 is to be contained in a standard humanoid containment cell at Site F. The cell must be equipped with seizure detection and medical monitoring equipment to ensure the safety of personnel interacting with FOC-058. Access to FOC-058's containment cell is restricted to authorized personnel with Level 3 security clearance or higher.

All interviews and interactions with FOC-058 must be conducted through closed-circuit cameras and communication devices to minimize the risk of exposure to its anomalous effects. Personnel assigned to interact with FOC-058 must undergo training on recognizing and managing cuteness-induced seizures.

Description: FOC-058 is a Selkirk Rex cat with short fuzzy hair, approximately 1'1" in height, legally classed as a "smol boi." The entity claims the Cat Monarchy™ title of "Lord Spoingus," but is commonly referred to as "Spoingus" or "FOC-058." Spoingus is known for directing and starring in the 2003 film "Breast Cancer."

Very little is known about FOC-058's early life, as it is highly secretive on the matter. It claims to have been born in Europe with family living in Louisiana, but the sources on its birth year are contradictory. Spoingus stated in one interview that it was born in 1968 or 1969, while a former colleague claims to have seen immigration papers suggesting a birth in Bingustan in the mid-to-late 1950s.

Even before its career in cinema, FOC-058 was reputedly extremely wealthy. It is known to own a luxurious mansion, a massive statue of itself, several sports cars, and a basement full of weapons. The source of its wealth remains unknown, and there are various speculations surrounding it.

The primary anomaly associated with FOC-058 is its effect on individuals who look at it. Observers experience a feeling of overwhelming cuteness, which may lead to seizures in approximately 63% of cases. The cuteness-induced seizures vary in intensity and duration, but they are generally non-life-threatening. However, due to this anomalous property, FOC-058 is classified as Arcane to account for the potential risks posed to personnel.

Additionally, FOC-058's allegiances to either King Floppa or King Bingus remain uncertain. It has been observed supporting and serving both monarchs, leading to speculation about possible double allegiances or working behind their backs.